SEYMOUR'S PEANUT BUTTER TIME

It's been a while since I've posted on this thing but life has been pretty hectic I suppose...First it was my birthday, then midterms...then I got sick, got better, then sick again. Oh and then came finals. Wonderful. But I finally made it to summer, only to realise that summer wasn't much to look forward to now that I've decided to work instead of going abroad. Do I regret that decision? Slightly...but I just got my paycheck from training and let me just say that this is probably one of the better decisions I've made thus far. My next paycheck is coming and I know that my plan was to save it up as I will probably not have a job once I decide to graduate...early or not, but I think I'm not going to hold myself back on all the activities I've always wanted to do such as sky diving. I held back on sky diving before because it was just so expensive and I didn't want to spend my money on something as fleeting an experience as that. But I think I will. I just need to find some companions.

On the subject of people, I know I do a lot of ranting/bitching on here. Mostly because I find myself irritated with the general populous and without an outlet. I'm finding that quite a bit of my friends are self absorbed when it comes to me trying to confide in them. I try to tell them something and instead of getting a response related to mine, I get to listen to them rant about something entirely different instead. And I do listen, because they're my friends. But when do I get a turn?

But whatevs right? I guess this is my outlet. I am currently at work and while I would like to read my book since I've finished most of my tasks and am just waiting for other people to come check out, I need to get this off my chest.

People are not as helpful as they try to portray. And it's not that they're not knowledgeable about how to do it, they just don't feel the need to help/support me when I turn to them. Perhaps it's because they know that I'm a returner. But guess what? If you don't remember me from last year, it means that I am not a current returner. It has been about 2 years since I last worked here and while somethings are familiar, a lot of the procedures have eluded me and I do need some prompting.

Oh and on first impressions, people usually say you only get one. I do believe in second chanced sometimes but today, my first interaction with another coworker was unpleasant in a way. She was completely rude to me, being very short with me when I had called to remind her to unforward the phones since I was on the phone with a guest that was trying to reach her. She is not the only one that is stressed and busy at work, I had to keep a guest on hold which trying to contact her and help the people here. Perhaps if she arrived just a tad bit earlier, then she could handle her business without affecting others. It only takes a couple seconds to unforward the phone and she could have done it while talking to me instead of being rude. But whatevs, maybe I won't write her off yet since overwhelmed people tend to snap. But fuck you, I was doing my job.

Oh and old friends? Or rather people that I used to be friends with but have since drifted apart. I know that we're no longer close, but just because we're no longer friends but rather acquaintances now, one would expect that you would perhaps be a little more courteous instead of spiteful. I found out from an old high school friend that they were trying to organise a high school reunion. She had wondered if my other friend from high school had told me about it. She didn't. That would explain the phone call from her out of the blue. But I was at work so I didn't pick up. One would expect a voicemail. Obviously that had slipped from her mind. Or perhaps she was being a lazy bitch. And the bitch part refers to the fact that what probably happened was that someone asked her to call me and let me know. And she decided to call me and since I didn't pick up, didn't leave a message since all she had to do was call me. That is a bitchy move and I could see her doing that. Entirely rude in my opinion and not that surprising since the reason I haven't talked to her since is because she hasn't answered and of my phone calls nor texts. And no, she didn't bother to return my call either. I don't like to waste my time and unlimited texts on people that are going to be rude and just ignore my attempts at communication. Oh, and she didn't even bother to wish me a happy birthday when people I am not that close to did. So fuck her. If I even bother going to the reunion, which I probably won't since I'm working the graveyard shift, I probably wouldn't bother trying to catch up with her since it's obvious she's decided that being polite is out of the question as well. I probably would have tried to take the day off if I had known. But since I didn't, and that particular day is my graveyard shift, I think I'd rather sleep than to drive 2 hours to see some people that I am not particularly excited to see.

And this ends my rant. Maybe something other that people irritating me will make it's way into this blog. But until then...

Especially when I know for a fact they're lying. So I had to have someone take my shift for tomorrow because I had a midterm during that time. Last week I asked if anybody could take it because it's just smart to ask in advance. Well last Monday my new coworker that I semi despise offered to take it and within the same email she asked if I could take her shift that day. Of course I had to say no because I had class that day and it was so ridiculously last minute that I just felt obliged to say no anyways. Well I get an email back saying that she was sorry but she realised that she would go over her hours and that she hopes it doesn't inconvenience me in anyway. Of course what initially passed through my mind was that she took back her offer because I wouldn't/couldn't take her last minute shift. But I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt. Still with me?

Okay so today, I get a text from my friend/favourite coworker (she definitely hates the new girl lol) saying that she offered to take her shift this week(Saturday). WTF!? It's the same fucking week. How is it that she couldn't take my shift anymore because she would be over her hours but she can offer to take my friend's shift which is within the same week/payperiod?????

IF you don't really get the hours/pay thing I'll explain really quick. Because we work for the university and are still students, we are only allotted a certain amount of hours per week. The week goes from Sunday to Saturday. My shift was for this Monday 4/27 my friend's shift is Saturday 5/2. It's the same fucking week.

Why fucking lie? It's really not my fault that 1) she didn't request the time off early enough and 2) I had class. Actually she was told many times that she was the only one that could do that shift. And 3) she could have been more upfront saying I can take your Monday if you take my shift. But she didn't and so now she is completely a hate that bitch on my list. Not just because of this incident but it definitely sealed the deal. She barely started and already fucked up by losing her access card.

I'm so proud that I even made it to the library that it's a little bit ridiculous. But I honestly don't really set foot in here unless I needed a book asap or the printing lines at the MU are long. I've never really had a good experience studying here because I was under the impression that the library was supposed to be a quiet environment and not a place for loud, irrelevant conversations. Or it was late at night and creepy. And it's always cold. Actually even now as I'm typing this some guy started talking...I think on the phone because I only hear one voice.

But anyways, I kind of like the library but I think I average about 3x per quarter. Today was especially important because I need to study for my two midterms and not watch the Law and Order CI marathon they have going on today. And boo, I work tonight so I'm going to miss the premiere of Jeff Goldblum.

Okay. Enough bloggery talkery, it's time to do what I came here to do: REEEEEEEEAD!

So I was watching some show and in this one scene at the airport, I noticed that the flight attendants practising synchronised walking. Their uniforms and I assume hair are probably perfectly in place as well. I've heard that this is something that is stressed by some airlines?? Or is it some in Asia?? Is this even true at all??????

How impressive it must be for them to all be so uniform and orderly. Almost as if they were some sort of secret military or sect in disguise.

I wish they had AKG songs for Rock Band...or even Guitar Hero, I'm not picky. They are absolutely my favourite band of all time and that's saying a lot since I go through a favourite song of the week phase every so often. Instead of working on my Spanish compositions (yes plural, bastards), I spent tonight going through all the songs and videos I loved. They have like no bad songs. Well worth it I say.

...still pretty bad at english.

1) Just because I'm a loner doesn't mean I'm not lonely. It's sad but true. Can't help it. Don't know how to change it.
2) I have nothing to look forward to. Not my birthday, not studying abroad, not a cool job, not early graduation, nothing.
3) I have no friends. Or practically none.
4) I need to eat better. Before I ate nothing. Now I'm cramming in all kinds of horrible food in my body because I'm telling myself, better than nothing right? Wrong.
5) Gym? I'm too unmotivated/in a slump with a case of the grumps to do it.

So I did some dumb shit today. Well, one that's FML dumb. I sent a text to someone, saying something about someone. And I actually sent it to that someone. Makes sense? Lol show of hands that want to know what the text said...

I've done that before but when it was harmless and I could say "Oh my bad". But this text was specific. Not like anything bad to them or FOR them. Mostly embarassing to me if I let it.

Freudian slip? Probably. But oh well, I'm not worried cos I keepz it moving suckaaaa.

Today I walked past one of my former roommates. I barely recognised her as we walked past each other because it was just so fast but it was definitely her. And I told my friend that I just saw her and that she got fat. How female of me right? Except to be honest, she did get a little chubbier than before. And I only noticed because she's one of those Asian girls that are obsessed with their weight; losing it and looking skinnier. Opps.

It's been almost a year and I still haven't watched the last episode of Mianhada, sanranghanda. I probably never will. And of course instead of studying for my physics midterm, I find out that I can no longer type in Korean on my computer so I had to romanize it. Curse you computer for dying.

Racism annoys me. And I experienced some today. I was saddened by it because I thought to myself who does that? Then I remembered. Almost everyone. I've been in this stupid small town for so long that I've been disconnected to something that I used to be so aware of. We're all in college, in a top university and I had expected more from this community. Obviously I expected too much. This wasn't the way I was brought up or taught. And while I've always been aware of racism, I definitely didn't expect it this time.

I responded with something insane and profane. Oh well. Fucking douche bag.

I tell myself that if I forgot it, I probably don't need it. Then I remember that I forgot to bring toothpaste with me to Chile. So maybe this isn't an all encompassing rule...

Carl's Jr express is so fast they don't even ask you what kind of soda you want. That guy was lucky that I'm okay with Coke. Good stuff though since I had to catch the bus in like 5 minutes to get to work. Awesome.

I'm not much of a gossiper but I'll admit that sitting here Wednesday morning hearing the coordinators whisper in a not so whipering voice about someone they're displeased about intrigued me. Sounds like someone's close to getting fi~red.

I hate talking about certain things I do to certain people. And by certain things I guess I mean everything from school, work and even free time activities. Why does everything need to be a competition and why do you feel the need to compare yourself to me and what I do?

I recently got a second job because I needed the money. It's a tutoring job and I'll admit it does seem like a high pay. But honestly, I'm thinking it has more to do with the other details that come with the job, not just the actual tutoring. The paperwork involved is ridiculous and you have no right to say that you should be getting paid more because you're more experienced. And yea, I know in your head you're thinking you could do a better job than I could but let's face it, you don't even meet the requirements for this job. Obviously my employers thought I would manage well enough to earn the amount of money that I'm getting and since you're the one setting your own rates, I don't see why you feel the need to put down my abilities when in more than one instance you've come to me for help. Just up your fees if you really think you're that great. But there isn't that much of a difference. I don't know if it's because you're incredibly nosy or just competitive, having to know exactly what I do and for how much. Oh, and reminding me how many classes you're taking doesn't impress me. Because I'm in no hurry to graduate and I will still be able to graduate before you without having to cram in all these classes and use other people to make sure you do well.

This is directed at a particular person at the moment, but I mean, in general this holds true. I know this is a competitive society, but honestly, you worry about yours and I'll worry about mine. I handle my business my way just fine. Fucking asians...




Edit: On second thought, maybe if I were a more accomplished liar, I could have avoided the situation in general, but why the hell would I lie about something as trivial as how much I'm making in my stupid job?? Sigh, I need to learn how to weed out irrelevant information and just gloss over details...

Omg, I finally know the name of the hottest guy in the world. Lol I'm probably exaggerating, but I hella remember seeing him in My name is Kim Sam-soon and thinking omg he's fkn hawt. AND his English is good. Turns out he's half Brit, which is a plus I guess? Haha man, hapa kids are good looking. Well, most of them. Anyways, I forgot what I really wanted to blog about. I bet it had something to do with my dumbass roommate getting her internet shut off for downloading off limewire. What a fool.


Edit: Lol, as soon as pressed post, I realised that I didn't even type in his name. Daniel Henney!!! The list: Gotta watch X-men origins: Wolverine.

It's 7am and I'm awake, barely. So is my roommate if her alarm is any indication. As I'm stumbling out of the bathroom, I hear her voice. WHO IS SHE TALKING TO AT 7AM??? I hear her talking all the way to the bathroom. Yea, btw, I would never want to call her because she's on the phone in the bathroom too...Could it be that she gets on the phone as soon as she wakes up? Or maybe she only restarted the conversation after her alarm went off. I swear she's ALWAYS on the phone. I can hear her voice from my room/the bathroom, but not distinctly enough to figure out who she's talking to. I always do wonder. 3 am and I've heard her voice. Is she on the phone or doing the voice chat thing with her WoW buddies? I guess her voice has more of a booming quality because I can hear her voice even from the living room sometimes and I can't even hear the TV blaring from the living room in my room. So that says something. But I don't care, it doesn't really bother me except the talking in the bathroom thing, I hope she's just washing her hands. What I really want to know is, with whom is she always conversating on the phone with and about what???


PS, I hate working at 8am. Esp when I'm sickish.

My dad was helping me fold and pack up my laundry and when I was putting it away, I noticed that my jeans were folding kinda funky. Instead of folding the two legs over each other like I do, he folds it the way that I would guess that people do prior to ironing for that crease on pants...
Coolness. I don't think I will be ironing my jeans, or anything in the near future unless I get the Toby, which only costs about $100 to get the same steam cleaning action that the dry cleaners do and all you have to do is fill it up with tap water and turn it in. Lol. I like that infomercial.

I make lists now. Of things that I want to do. Whether it be something as simple as buying bread or as delicious as going to a restaurant that I haven't been to before, I like the feeling of checking it off my list. I've also resolved to having some friends with me when I do something from my list (not the errands...) and taking a picture as a memento. It's my new hobby.


Check off my list for:
-Red Lobster
-Driving stick

-Eating cheesecake with hot chocolate


I had other things done on my list but those were the ones that I have a picture of, which I will post up or maybe print out and do like a little journal. I'd call it the list :)


B: Watch out Dee, don't step on the gum.
D *dodges green gum* Thanks
B: Saved your life
D: ...Not so much...
J: You mean, saved your sole! (Soul..if not obvious...)



 

1. I don't like the way I look.
2. I have no motivation.
3. I want biceps of steel and a three pack.
4. I really like cheese.
5. I'm indecisive.
6. I'm ruled by my stomach.
7. I don't think I'm a good person.
8. I can't smile.
9. I don't like my smile.
10. I don't laugh anymore.
11. When I want something, I only want it for a certain amount of time. Then I forget about it.
12. I'm not passionate about anything.
13. I love Psych.
14. I want to laugh.
15. I'm too impressionable...especially at this age.
16. I'm socially awkward.
17. I like getting my hair cut even though I'm still trying to grow it out.
18. I'm impusive.
19. I like drawing fire breathing animals.
20. I forget.
21. Almost.